They still say I have the softest moustache south of Athlone. You’re welcome to put that to the test – I encourage plenty of moustache tickles, especially on first dates.

So swipe right if you want the Dea 😉

Don’t know your carbon footprint? To the left, to the left.

Ideal man person: The body of Eamon Ryan, the mind of Greta Thunberg and the voice of David Attenborough. 🥰

<3 Destiny’s Child. This song inspired me to get into politics. Thinking of following in Beyonce’s footsteps and going solo though…

♫ All the TDs, who are independent. Throw your hands up at me
All the FAI execs, who makin’ money. Throw your hands up at me
All the poppas, who profit dollas. Throw your hands up at me
All the TDs, who truly feel me. Throw your hands up at me ♫

Welcome to my TDer profile comrades.

If you paid your water charge, swipe left.

I used to be a Plenty of Fish man but had to splinter away because it didn’t perfectly match my worldview in every possible way.

My ideal date would be roleplay… you’re Captain Planet, and I’m the Asian one with the water ring. Together we save the world, end water charges and make sweet, sweet love. I’ll supply the costumes 😉

I wasn’t really involved in the total destruction of the country by my party… so that’s my best quality.

You can expect more dirty talk along those lines if we get together. 😏

Swipe right if you’re a tall, confident, bald man with glasses.

People with no loyalty also really turn me on.

Did I mention I have a soft spot for bald fellas? I’d follow them anywhere…

Having no luck on this – I keep getting ghosted for not understanding my brief.

Where are all the gentlemen gone? Let’s match and ignore each other.

The good times are back, baby!

I’m back on the market after my last relationship crashed and burned. Basically, I overspent and had to apply to the credit union for a bailout in order to pay the Sky and energy bills.

My biggest political achievement is introducing the smoking ban in 2004. But there isn’t anything in the legislation prohibiting smokin’ hotties…

“Fianna Fáil is the path to the dark side. Fianna Fáil leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.” – Yoda

Big into sci-fi. My favourite character is Han Solo because he’s financially prudent and only spends credits on the Millennium Falcon when it’s in danger of exploding – much like my approach to health and housing.

I put the “pump” into parish pump politics.

All Tinder dates will receive a Healy Rae calendar every Christmas.

I will also show up at your funeral.

I think of myself as a female version of Simon Harris. I’m young and inexperienced but also really good at making a serious face.

Instagram: @chamberoflove

Leo, Micheál and Mary Lou – the ménage à trois everyone wants to see.

Swipe right and I’ll make your heart-rate surge faster than Sinn Féin in the polls.

TikTok: @neverintheRa

My mum is famous. Be nice and I might introduce you.

Loves: shouting

Hates: ironing

Took a break from online dating after Tinder dates started turning up outside my house unannounced – scary stuff!

Now I’m back and I have a lot of matches to get through, so don’t be put off by the long waiting times.

You might be waiting for 12, 24 or even 48 hours, but I’ll get around to you eventually.

Tall, dark and sorta handsome if you squint.

My special move in the bedroom is known as “the backstop”.

Loves: frictionless relationships
Hates: emotional borders

Ignore the polls, Precious – I’m a grower, not a shower.

Swipe right and I promise you’ll be howlin’ in the bedroom in no time lol.

Height: 5 ft 4

Absolutely love Kylie. My favourite song is Spinning Around but I can’t listen to it anymore as it reminds me of a severe whitey I pulled one night after too many tokes.

Interested in men who get up REALLY early in the morning. Like, even before Morning Ireland. Also love a man in uniform, particularly shades of black/tan etc.

Swipe right and put my bedside manner to the test.

Power doesn’t just turn the television on, it turns me on too. I’m attracted to all kinds – wind, solar, electric, super, political…

I’m a powerful guy and I like total domination so I’m looking for someone who is into BDSM to play the submissive role.

I admire: Frank Underwood, Ming the Merciless, Stalin, Attila the Hun, Darth Vader, Superman (he is the most powerful man in the galaxy after all – so hot).

Height: 6 ft 1. You should never trust a man under 6 feet.

Looking for a good haranguing – haven’t had one in years.

Open to a one night harangue, or even a group harangue.

Navigating the cycle lane to my heart is no easy feat, as it’s plagued with potholes and congestion.

But with a sexy little high-vis jacket and a working horn, you’ll get there in no time.
🦺📯😎

Add me on Snapchat: carbonfootfetish

Doesn’t drink. Hates swings.

Isn’t Press Up an exercise?